哈佛大學錄取文書范例分析！原來這些文書要素很重要！

想要寫出一篇優秀的文書，絕非一蹴而就的事情。相信每位經歷過申請季的申請黨們一定都有體會過煉獄般的文書修改過程，徹底完成一篇文書的時間有時甚至高達一兩個月。語言流暢度、邏輯清晰度、層次分明度，語法有無錯誤、內容是否過于直白或涉及敏感問題……每個點都需要仔細打磨和反復推敲。

文書是否出彩，是否能夠打動招生官，是學生最終收獲夢校錄取的關鍵之一。一篇優秀的文書有時能夠在標化成績不理想的情況下，讓招生官看到申請者在其他方面的潛能，助你逆風翻盤。什么才是優秀的文書呢？與其泛泛地查詢各種文書方法論，不如直接來看美國大學官方的真實范例。

23-24申請季業已開始，與新一年文書題目公開的同時還有各大名校范文的更新。近期，最新一年的十篇哈佛范文公布，其中優秀文書原文和文書點評都在網站上向讀者公開。

本期，我們就給大家精選出22-23Fall哈佛錄取生的優秀文書的其中三篇，舉例構成優秀文書的那些Key elements。

哈佛范文

"Hook+Anchor+Story+Growth"

第一篇范文展示了成功文書的必備公式：Hook+Anchor+Story+Growth，那么這一公式的意涵何在，以及這一公式怎樣將作者的整體性顯示給招生官，請沉浸到原文中看看吧！

哈佛大學錄取文書原文

With the blazing morning sun beaming through the window, I had an inclination to make a stand to sell Lebanese laymounada - a light lemonade flavored with a splash of rosewater. Throughout my childhood, anytime the temperature spiked over seventy degrees, there would be laymounada waiting for me at my Teta’s (grandmother in Lebanese Arabic) house.

At that moment, I scoured the cabinets and secured the glass pitcher only to realize we did not have lemons. To my disappointment, I realized my days of being an entrepreneur and generating revenue from my laymounada stand were over before they could even begin. I sat at the kitchen table, wallowing in disappointment. I wanted everyone to be able to taste my Teta’s laymounada. Suddenly, I had an idea that would either prove to be inventive or a total failure. I would sell lemonade without the lemons. Revolutionary, right?

I ripped off a rectangular sheet of paper towel and jotted down my business plan. I listed the key elements of the business plan: a drawing of a cup, a rose, and the price- “fifty scents”- to correlate with the rose-themed business. I sat outside of my childhood home located in a cul-de-sac of five houses and sold my neighbors a rose drink- a combination of filtered water, packets of sugar, and a dash of rosewater. Granted, I only made about $10 from a combination of my parents and generous neighbors who did not drink the “lemonade”, but the experience allowed me to realize regardless of the obstacle, if you are passionate, you can persevere. Teta’s laymounada was my introduction to entrepreneurship.

The entrepreneurial skills gained from my laymounada stand allowed me to establish A&G Jewelry, co-founded with my sister when I was twelve. This business focused on representing our Lebanese heritage. Using supplies we found around our house and from our local craft store, we created a variety of pieces that featured traditional Middle Eastern coins, beads, and clay baked into the shape of Lebanon. My sister and I collaborated to create marketing tools to promote our new business. Before we knew it, A&G Jewelry had earned a spot at my church’s annual Lebanese festival. After tirelessly marketing and selling our jewelry for three days straight, we had made over $900 in revenue, which we decided to donate to the church.
Entrepreneurship took a new form in high school when my sister and I founded our second partnership, The Model Brockton City Council. We saw a need to engage our peers in local government by designing a simulation of our city council. We had to collect signatures, present to many administrators, and market our new club. The initial goal to have more people try my lemonade resonated with me as I strived to have more people engage in their civic duties. Today, over twenty-five of my classmates frequently attend my meetings.

With my first business venture selling laymounada, I made $10; with A&G Jewelry, $900; with the Model Brockton City Council, the revenue amounted to $0. Although there was not a financial gain, I attained experience as a negotiator, problem solver, creative thinker, and most importantly, I became persistent.

Twelve years have passed since that summer day with my “laymounada,” and I have yet to maintain a long-lasting business. My six-year-old self would have seen this lack of continuity as a colossal failure, but instead, it instilled an intense curiosity in me. Little did I know the experience would remain so vivid after all these years. It has continued to push me, compelling me to challenge myself both academically and entrepreneurially. As I grow older, my intrinsic drive to have a lemonade stand, regardless of whatever obstacles come my way, persists as a deep-seated love of business.

When life doesn’t give you lemons, still make lemonade (or laymounada, as my Teta would say).

范文參考譯文

清晨，熾熱的陽光透過窗戶灑在我的身上，我不由自主地想擺攤賣黎巴嫩的 laymounada（一種加了玫瑰水的淡檸檬水）。在我的童年時代，只要氣溫超過七十度，我的特塔（黎巴嫩阿拉伯語中的祖母）家就會有 laymounada 等著我。

那一刻，我翻遍了櫥柜，找到了玻璃水壺，卻發現我們家沒有檸檬。令我失望的是，我意識到我想成為一名企業家并從我的 laymounada 攤位上創收的日子還沒開始就已經結束了。我坐在廚房的桌子旁，沉浸在失望之中。我希望每個人都能品嘗到我的 Teta's laymounada。突然，我有了一個想法，這個想法要么被證明是別出心裁，要么被證明是徹底失敗。我要賣沒有檸檬的檸檬水。很革命吧？

我撕下一張長方形紙巾，記下了我的商業計劃。我列出了商業計劃書的關鍵要素：一個杯子的圖畫、一朵玫瑰，以及價格--"50 種香味"--與玫瑰主題的業務相關聯。我坐在兒時的家門口，那里有五棟房子，我向鄰居們推銷玫瑰飲料--過濾水、糖包和少許玫瑰水的組合。當然，我只從父母和慷慨的鄰居那里賺了大約 10 美元，他們都沒有喝 "檸檬水"，但這次經歷讓我意識到，無論遇到什么困難，只要有熱情，就能堅持下去。Teta 的 laymounada 是我的創業入門。

從 laymounada 攤位上獲得的創業技能讓我在 12 歲時與姐姐共同創辦了 A&G 珠寶公司。這項業務的重點是體現我們的黎巴嫩傳統。我們利用從家里和當地手工藝品商店淘來的材料，制作了各種以中東傳統硬幣、珠子和烤成黎巴嫩形狀的粘土為特色的飾品。我和妹妹合作制作了營銷工具，以推廣我們的新業務。在我們意識到這一點之前，A&G 珠寶已經在我教會一年一度的黎巴嫩節上贏得了一席之地。經過連續三天不懈的營銷和銷售，我們的珠寶收入超過了 900 美元，我們決定將這筆錢捐給教會。

高中時，我和妹妹創建了我們的第二家合伙企業--布羅克頓市模范議會（The Model Brockton City Council），創業精神由此煥然一新。我們認為有必要通過設計一個模擬市議會，讓我們的同齡人參與到地方政府中來。我們必須收集簽名，向許多行政人員介紹，并推銷我們的新俱樂部。最初的目標是讓更多的人嘗嘗我的檸檬水，這引起了我的共鳴，我努力讓更多的人參與到公民義務中來。如今，我的二十五位同學經常參加我的會議。

第一次創業賣 laymounada，我賺了 10 美元；A&G 珠寶店賺了 900 美元；布羅克頓市模范議會的收入為 0 美元。雖然沒有經濟收益，但我獲得了談判者、問題解決者、創造性思維者的經驗，最重要的是，我變得堅持不懈。

自從那個夏日和我的 "laymounada "在一起后，12 年過去了，我還沒有維持長久的生意。六歲時的我可能會把這種缺乏持續性視為巨大的失敗，但這反而激發了我強烈的好奇心。我不知道這段經歷會在這么多年后依然如此生動。它不斷鞭策著我，迫使我在學業和創業方面不斷挑戰自己。隨著年齡的增長，無論遇到什么困難，我都會堅持開一個檸檬水攤，這是我對商業根深蒂固的熱愛。

當生活沒有給你檸檬時，仍然要做檸檬水（或者用我的泰塔的話說，做檸檬水）。

專業點評

許多成功的大學作文都遵循一個簡單的公式：Hook+Anchor+Story+Growth（鉤子+錨點+故事+成長）。雖然具體內容可能各不相同，但如果你能包含這四個要素中的每一個，你就能寫出一篇引人注目的文章。

鉤子：“鉤子”的作用是吸引讀者。招生官每天要閱讀成百上千篇文章，因此要努力在第一時間抓住他們的注意力，用一些引人入勝或與眾不同的內容作為文章的開頭。

Georgina的“鉤子”就是她的“laymounada”攤位。黎巴嫩的laymounada（用玫瑰水調味的淡檸檬水）有什么特別之處？它與普通檸檬水有什么不同？而誰又是Teta？喬治娜用她對經典檸檬水攤故事的文化詮釋，激發了讀者的好奇心。

錨：“錨”是連接整篇文章、賦予其意義的觀點或主題。一個好的“錨”可以發人深省，讓讀者在讀完文章后感到滿意。

Georgina的“錨”是生活沒有給她檸檬。她在家里找不到一個檸檬，于是她不得不發揮創意，賣起了不含檸檬的laymounada。這次經歷讓她學會了堅忍不拔的精神，并由此開始了一連串的創業。最后，文章又回到了這個錨點，將一切串聯起來：“當生活沒有給你檸檬的時候，還是要做檸檬水（或者祖母Teta會說的laymounada）”。

故事：說到講故事，黃金法則是“show, don’t tell.（展示，而不是講述）”。不要只告訴招生官你是一個多么優秀的人。相反，要試著通過你的故事向他們展示你的個性、品格和成就。

在Georgina的故事中，她分享了讓她難忘的檸檬水攤經歷的所有豐富多彩的細節。例如，她在故事中加入了一些有趣的細節，比如為了迎合玫瑰花的主題，她將自己的飲料定價為“五十種香味”。她還開玩笑說，她賺到的10美元主要來自于支持她的父母和慷慨的鄰居，他們甚至懶得喝 “lemonade”。

這些細節描繪了Georgina有趣、富有創造力和進取心的形象，同時也展現了她的謙遜。她還很好地融入了自己如何為社區帶來影響的動力：“在連續三天不知疲倦地推銷和銷售我們的珠寶之后，我們的收入超過了900美元，我們決定把這筆錢捐給教堂”。

成長：所有優秀的大學申請文書都會清楚地展示你是如何從自己的經歷中成長起來的。一定要突出你從自己的經歷中學到了什么或收獲了什么。

例如，Georgina了解到，她在創業過程中缺乏連續性并不是“巨大的失敗”。相反，這培養了她的好奇心、堅持能力和對商業的熱愛。在文章的最后，Georgina顯然是一個（對商業）充滿熱情的人，她有開辟自己道路的經歷。她能夠從每一次經歷中吸取經驗教訓，并將其運用到下一次的事業中。

Georgina抓住了所有四個關鍵要素--Hook+Anchor+Story+Growth--這就是這篇文章成功的原因。

"Well-structured"

第二篇范文告訴了我們文書結構的重要性，在具備相應的關鍵要素后，怎樣合理安排文書的行進也是行文中需要深思熟慮的部分。下面這篇范文很好地展示了文書中的合理結構會是怎樣的。

哈佛大學錄取文書原文

There’s a theory that even though each color has a specific wavelength that never changes, how people perceive a specific color may have subtle differences based on small differences in photoreceptors, and the color that one person might consider red might still be red in another’s mind but could look different— a little duller, softer, cooler. Furthermore, how a person’s brain processes the color may also be linked to that person’s environment. Some studies have suggested that color sensitivity could be linked to one’s native languages: for example, people who speak languages that have specific names for eleven colors are able to easily distinguish those eleven colors, but people who speak languages with fewer color specific words may have a harder time distinguishing them.

So it appears that even at the most elementary level of sight, the world is not an objective thing. Instead, what we know and what we remember can influence what and how we see. The color blue may just be the color blue to a three year old, perhaps her favorite color even, but an adult might connect it to so much more—the lake by his childhood home or the eye color of a loved one.

I first consciously became aware of the power that our experiences have to change perception when I went to turn on a light in my house after learning about photons in class. What had previously been a mundane light suddenly became a fascinating application of atomic structure, and I thought that I could almost perceive the electrons jumping up and down from energy level to energy level to produce the photons that I saw. I then realized that my world had steadily been changing throughout my years in school as I learned more and more. I now see oligopolies in the soda aisles of the supermarkets. I see the charges warring with each other in every strike of lightning, and the patterns of old American politics still swaying things today. Knowledge and making connections with that knowledge is the difference between seeing the seven oceans glittering in the sun and merely seeing the color blue. It’s the difference between just seeing red and seeing the scarlet of roses blooming, the burgundy of blood pumping through veins, and crimson of anger so fierce that you could burst. Knowledge is color; it is depth, and it is seeing a whole new world without having to move an inch.

It is knowledge, too, that can bring people together. I love listening to people’s stories and hearing about what they know and love, because if I learn about what they know, I can learn how they see the world; consequently, since behavior is often based upon perception, I can understand why a person behaves the way they do. On a road trip during the summer, my mom kept looking up at the streetlights lining the highways. When I asked why, she told me that whenever she saw lights by a highway she would wonder if her company had made them. She would guess how tall they were, how wide, and what style they were. She told me that ever since she started working for her company, lights no longer were just lights to her. They were a story of people who first had to measure the wind speed to figure out what dimension the lights had to be, and then of engineers, of money passing hands—possibly even under her own supervision as an accountant—and then of transportation, and of the people who had to install them. I might never perceive lights the exact way my mother does or see her “red” but by hearing her describe what she knows, I can understand her world and realize her role in ours.
Beauty and color are in the world, but it is seeking the unknown and making new connections that unlocks them from their greyscale cage.

范文參考譯文

有一種理論認為，盡管每種顏色都有特定的波長，而且這種波長永遠不會改變，但人們對特定顏色的感知可能會因感光器的細微差別而產生微妙的差異。此外，一個人的大腦如何處理顏色也可能與他所處的環境有關。一些研究表明，對顏色的敏感度可能與一個人的母語有關：例如，使用有 11 種顏色特定名稱的語言的人能夠很容易地分辨出這 11 種顏色，但使用顏色特定詞匯較少的語言的人可能較難分辨出這些顏色。

由此看來，即使在最初級的視覺層面，世界也不是客觀存在的。相反，我們的知識和記憶會影響我們看到什么以及如何看到。對于一個三歲的孩子來說，藍色可能只是藍色，甚至可能是她最喜歡的顏色，但對于一個成年人來說，藍色可能與更多的東西聯系在一起--他兒時家附近的湖泊，或者是他所愛的人眼睛的顏色。

當我在課堂上學習了光子的知識后，去打開家里的一盞燈時，我第一次有意識地意識到，我們的經歷具有改變感知的力量。我想，我幾乎可以感知到電子在能級之間上下跳躍，從而產生我所看到的光子。然后我意識到，隨著我學到的知識越來越多，我的世界在我的求學生涯中一直在穩步變化。現在，我在超市的汽水貨架上看到了寡頭壟斷。

我看到每一道閃電中的電荷都在相互交戰，舊美國政治的模式至今仍在左右著一切。知識與知識之間的聯系，是看到七大洋在陽光下閃閃發光與僅僅看到藍色之間的區別。這是只看到紅色與看到玫瑰綻放的猩紅、血管中血液流動的酒紅、憤怒到讓人爆裂的深紅之間的區別。知識就是色彩，知識就是深度，知識就是不需要移動一寸，就能看到一個全新的世界。

知識還能將人們團結在一起。我喜歡聽別人講故事，聽他們講述自己的所知所愛，因為如果我了解了他們的所知所愛，我就能知道他們是如何看待這個世界的。在暑假的一次公路旅行中，我媽媽一直抬頭看著公路兩旁的路燈。當我問起原因時，她告訴我，每當她看到公路旁的路燈時，她就會想這些路燈是不是她的公司制造的。她會猜這些路燈有多高，有多寬，是什么款式。

她告訴我，自從她開始在自己的公司工作后，燈對她來說就不再只是燈了。對她來說，電燈不再只是電燈，而是一個故事：首先，人們要測量風速，以確定電燈的尺寸；然后，工程師們要測量風速，以確定電燈的尺寸；最后，錢要轉手--甚至可能是在她作為會計的監督下轉手--然后是運輸，以及安裝電燈的人。我可能永遠無法像母親那樣準確地感知燈光，也無法看到她的 "紅色"，但通過聽她描述她所知道的一切，我可以理解她的世界，并認識到她在我們世界中的作用。

美和色彩就在這個世界上，但只有尋求未知，建立新的聯系，才能將它們從灰暗的牢籠中解救出來。

專業點評

Amy以“求知欲”為中心，用生動的描述性語言，將引人入勝的科學理論、色彩研究和視覺聯系起來，展示了有限/廣博的知識如何塑造我們的現實和經歷，從而寫出了一篇引人注目、發人深省的文章。

整篇文章體現了Amy不斷學習的熱情和成長，她將自己的知識與周圍環境聯系起來，尋找隱藏的真理。一個人可以通過了解他人的知識或故事來理解他人的行為或感知，這是一個簡單而深刻的宏觀主題--對知識、真理、分享想法和經驗的好奇心無疑可以將許多人聚集在一起。這讓我想起了狹義相對論和廣義相對論的發現者阿爾伯特-愛因斯坦的著名自白："我沒有什么特殊才能。我只有強烈的好奇心"。

這篇文章的結構非常合理，每一段都進一步闡明了Amy對新信息和聯系的渴望。

1-2段中，她首先介紹了一個引人入勝的科學背景，即盡管顏色具有特定的波長，但對于兩個人來說，會說的語言不同，視覺效果也會不同。這很吸引人，我想讀下去！她天衣無縫地將有關色彩的理論和研究結合在一起，從而推斷出我們的世界并不是一個放之四海而皆準的旅程，我們各自的教育和經歷會改變我們的所見所聞。

在第 3 段中，艾米展示了她的第一個“A-ha”時刻，她意識到并形象地描述了她在課堂上學到的光子粒子從她的“平凡之光”中發出的真正科學過程！她的大腦像海綿一樣，在不斷成長的世界中吸收著新的數據流，開始將日常活動與經濟、自然現象和政治等大局觀念聯系起來。這一點闡述得非常清楚！

第 4 段是實打實的gamechanger。她的“從教育到社會理解”的口號進一步啟示我們：教育、開放的心態以及了解他人的故事和經歷的確可以在看似不同的世界之間架起橋梁。Amy最后以自己的母親對高速公路路燈的認識為例，說明任何人都可以將自己的知識、經驗與環境聯系起來。最后，Amy以自己的人生智慧和對“尋找未知，建立聯系”的清晰反思作為結尾，結束了文書。

總之，Amy得出了一個有力的結論：教育、同理心、傾聽、理解和聯系，都是她對生活充滿激情的動力。艾米說她渴望了解萬事萬物，尤其是人，她把自己描繪成一個充滿好奇心、討人喜歡的學生--是一個充滿活力的學術團體的理想成員。

"Aisle Essay"

當你面對空白文檔時，腦袋里蹦出了一萬個非寫不可的故事或思路，你要怎樣將它們串聯起來？第三篇范文給出了一個解法，“aisle essay”這一方法可以將小標題們串聯起來，使得文章統一且合乎邏輯。

哈佛大學錄取文書原文

Barreling through the hallowed, mahogany double doors, I was on a mission. I made a beeline for the back. Behold, a panoply of new prospects, each beckoning me to read them.

Every weekend, my father, my sister, and I make the pilgrimage to Book Mecca. The sensations one meets upon entering Barnes and Noble are unmatched. The aroma of coffee mingles with the crisp perfume of unopened books, and the tinny music drifts from the ceiling speakers, coalescing with the clanking of the Cafe equipment, which is intermittently overcome by the barista's peppy voice on the PA system announcing the latest limited-edition dessert. Where else can one enjoy a triple-layer cheesecake among bookstacks? As Virginia Woolf says, "one cannot think well, love well, sleep well, if one has not dined well."

My family, however, dines on knowledge. To us, Barnes and Noble is an all-you-can-eat buffet for the mind. After we snag our favorite corner table, I sit, like metal to a magnet, immovable for hours.

I may delve into an Agatha Christie novel and attempt to outwit Detective Poirot; though I never win, I find the sleuthing remarkably similar to analyzing confounders the culprits of unexpected results-in my clinical research. Alternatively, I may crack open an atlas to test my memory from the summer when I memorized the entire world map. Or, I might read Animal Farm to better understand the system that ravaged Ethiopia in the late 20th century and forced my grandfather to flee his own village.

Complimenting this mission to satisfy our voracious minds comes an equally important fulfillment: engaging with the coterie of miscellaneous characters we have befriended. After visiting the same Barnes and Noble for eleven years, we have forged friendships with several regulars, including a retired teacher couple, an octogenarian with a seven-year-old brother, and an eternally sunburned man named George who shelters feral cats at his pool company's office. After a dear Barnes and Noble-goer passed away, my heart was comforted when I read in her obituary that she, indeed, would be missed by "the old [bookstore] gang." United by their good humor and love for Barnes and Noble, this unlikely group teaches me that a community can form around anything, no matter how disparate the members are. They show me that, in Aristotle's words, "educating the mind without educating the heart is no education at all."

While I have the luxury of Barnes and Noble, my father's reality growing up in rural Ethiopia bears a stark contrast and defines my legacy of education. He received a meager education in a laughable schoolhouse, using sunlight to study by day, and the moonlight by night. When he was nine, my grandfather opened a school so my father could continue beyond 4th grade, unlike many of his peers. My grandfather had no formal education, yet he knew the country's constitution by heart and exhorted nearby villages to educate their children.

My father's dedication to chauffeuring me to the bookstore and the library is an artifact of his father's same dedication. And I am the accumulation of this legacy. Behind me are all of the sacrifices and payoffs of my family's dedication to education, and before me is a lifetime of opportunity and fulfillment. Though I have never met my grandfather, I feel an incredibly palpable connection to him through our shared fervor to learn and teach. My father's and grandfather's stories remind me that education is not a commodity for many, but a privilege that I treat as such. I cherish all of my education's wonderful consequences: the obscure curiosities I have indulged in, the strong sense of identity I have developed, the discernment and morals I have bolstered, the respect I have gained for different viewpoints, and the ambition for excellence that I have inherited and extended. They are what fuel me, my college education, and my drive to pay it forward.

范文參考譯文

沖進神圣的紅木雙門，我就有了使命感。我徑直向后面走去。看啊，一排排新書，每一本都在向我招手，讓我讀一讀。

每個周末，父親、姐姐和我都會去圖書圣地朝圣。一走進巴諾書店，就會有無與倫比的感覺。咖啡的香氣與未開封書籍的清香交織在一起，天花板上的揚聲器里飄出刺耳的音樂，與咖啡館設備的叮當聲匯合在一起，間或還有咖啡師在擴音系統中播報最新限量版甜點的歡快聲音。還有什么地方能在書架間品嘗到三層芝士蛋糕呢？正如弗吉尼亞-伍爾夫（Virginia Woolf）所說，"如果一個人沒有好好用餐，就無法好好思考、好好戀愛、好好睡覺"。

然而，我的家人卻以知識為餐。對我們來說，巴諾書店就是一個任你享用的心靈自助餐廳。在我們搶到最喜歡的角落桌子后，我就坐在那里，就像磁鐵吸住了金屬，幾個小時紋絲不動。
我可能會鉆進阿加莎-克里斯蒂的小說里，試圖智取波洛偵探；雖然我從來沒有贏過，但我發現這種探案方式與我在臨床研究中分析混淆因素（造成意外結果的罪魁禍首）的方式非常相似。或者，我也會打開一本地圖冊，測試一下自己的記憶力，那個夏天我背下了整個世界地圖。或者，我可能會閱讀《動物農場》，以便更好地理解 20 世紀末肆虐埃塞俄比亞、迫使我祖父逃離自己村莊的制度。

除了滿足我們貪婪的欲望，還有一個同樣重要的成就感：與我們結交的小圈子里的各種人物打交道。十一年來，我們一直光顧同一家巴諾書店，與幾位常客建立了友誼，其中包括一對退休教師夫婦、一位帶著一個七歲弟弟的八旬老人，以及一位永遠曬不黑的名叫喬治的男子，他在泳池公司的辦公室里收容野貓。一位親愛的巴諾書店顧客去世后，當我在她的訃告中讀到 "老（書店）幫 "會懷念她時，我的心得到了安慰。他們的幽默和對《巴恩斯與諾布爾》的熱愛將這個不太可能的團體團結在一起，他們告訴我，無論成員之間有多大的差異，任何事情都可以形成一個團體。他們告訴我，用亞里士多德的話說，"沒有心靈教育的思想教育根本不是教育"。

雖然我擁有豪華的巴諾書店，但我父親在埃塞俄比亞農村長大的現實卻形成了鮮明的對比，也決定了我的教育遺產。他在一個可笑的校舍里接受了微薄的教育，白天利用陽光學習，晚上利用月光學習。父親九歲時，我的祖父開辦了一所學校，這樣父親就能繼續讀完四年級，這與許多同齡人不同。我的祖父沒有受過正規教育，但他對國家憲法了如指掌，并勸說附近的村莊讓他們的孩子接受教育。

我父親開車接送我去書店和圖書館，這也是他父親奉獻精神的體現。而我就是這份遺產的積累。在我的身后，是我的家庭為教育所付出的所有犧牲和回報，而在我的面前，則是一生的機遇和成就。雖然我從未見過我的祖父，但通過我們對學習和教學的共同熱忱，我感到了與他之間令人難以置信的聯系。父親和祖父的故事提醒我，教育對許多人來說不是商品，而是我的特權。我珍惜教育所帶來的一切美好結果：我沉迷于晦澀難懂的好奇心，我培養了強烈的身份認同感，我增強了辨別力和道德感，我獲得了對不同觀點的尊重，我繼承并擴展了追求卓越的雄心壯志。它們是我的動力，是我的大學教育，也是我回報社會的動力。

專業點評

Abby的文章非常出色。以下是她的做法，以及你也可以這樣做的方法：

Abby使用了一種我稱之為“aisle essay（過道式文書）”的方法。想象一下，推著購物車穿過雜貨店，挑選自己喜歡的食物并將它們放在購物車里。

在“aisle essay”中，作者推著一輛諺語式的購物車走過她的過去、現在和未來，一路上收集她的軼事、興趣和價值觀。將購物車視為文章的背景，Abby的購物車就是Barnes & Noble（巴諾書店）。

這個堅定的背景將文章置于一個易于描繪的世界中，讓Abby可以深入到她生活的不同層面，而不會讓文章顯得散亂。只要在購物車中找到文章中的每個小標題，文章就會讀起來像一篇統一的、合乎邏輯的文章。

在Abby的例子中，她利用圖書館的書籍和咖啡館巧妙地轉向她的個人敘事。偵探小說讓人想起她的“臨床研究”。提到《動物農場》，她就會提起祖父的非凡故事。通過描述她在咖啡館形成的古怪社區，艾比向我們展示了她是一個善于與人溝通的人，她因與人交往而興奮，并被她所遇到的人銘記。因此，雖然這篇文章發生在巴諾書店，但這并不是它的主題，巴諾書店只是向我們講述Abby的一個舞臺。

Abby在文章的最后明確提出了她的核心價值觀：感恩。她沒有夸大其詞，夸張地宣稱她將改變或拯救世界。相反，她只是向我們展示了一個真實的自己：一個經常光顧書店的充滿好奇心的女孩--一個從自己的過去中汲取靈感，在未來的紅木大門中奮力前行的人。

你能想到一個屬于你的典型環境嗎？在你的aisle essay中，你會從書架上抓住哪些興趣和價值觀？

關于文書寫作技巧

由于篇幅有限，本期我們暫時分享以上三篇，而這三篇文書也相應展示了文書寫作中常用但關鍵的技巧方法。

選擇合適的技巧方法會使得你的文書出奇制勝，同時也可以使你盡可能在招生官面前展示你同一的自我。

另外也請記住，真正意義上的寫作一直都應該是以人為本的寫作，動筆寫作前，請先反思好自己到底是誰，為什么你之所以為你。